think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
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