it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
You are a booty call, not a friend.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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