But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
i can't believe i had my finger in that
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
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