Grow some girl-balls and come out already
Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
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