dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
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