Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
Randomize
