MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize