Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
