Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
found a better reason to procrastinate than the usual sunday-don't-give-no-fucks. literally every one of my textbooks is soaked in captain. can't turn a page without gagging.
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
