I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
I need a beard to bite.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
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