Screwed.edu
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
Dear female. Happy valentines day. If you have not had the pleasure of making love to me, please do not fret, I will get around to it soon enough. If you indeed have made love to me, then bravo, wasn't that grand! Perhaps we should do it again? Regardless, have a good day. This has been a public service announcement. Rock on.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Gotta say, self-deprecating Lord of the Rings-themed sex jokes were not on my agenda for today.
Randomize
