sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
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