Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
