My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
I woke up to a topless girl handing me a blunt. Candidate for greatest wake-up ever?
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
you are never too drunk for berry picking
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
Randomize
