Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
