im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
Randomize
