We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
The struggles of a small town man whore
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize
