Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
Randomize