I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
I force fed him french fries and then proceeded to tell him how sexy corgi’s are … it’s safe to say he’s not texting me for a second date.
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
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