my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
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