The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
Randomize
