Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
