Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
Randomize
