I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Randomize
