Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(763): View more from Minnesota

I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off

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(770): View more from Georgia

Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?

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(848): View more from New Jersey

it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away

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(313): View more from Michigan

i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home

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(541): View more from Oregon

So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward

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(973): View more from New Jersey

doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...

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(650): View more from California

areolas are like halos for boobs.

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(847): View more from Illinois

I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.

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(678): View more from Georgia

I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.

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