I wannas sexs uuuuu
I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
Pooping to opera.
Randomize
