There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
This whole having a new phone thing is like starting all over in life with a clean slate! (My old text convos are gone)
New phone new life!
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
Randomize
