? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
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