Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
We need to feng shui this bitch.
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Randomize
