...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
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