So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
Randomize
