she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
Randomize