dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
Randomize
