Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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