Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Randomize
