if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
Randomize
