Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
Randomize
