Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
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