yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
i woke up with a grocery list signed by "the people who ate all your shit while you were passed out"
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
Thanks for telling my landlord that the poop stain was yours and not my secret dog.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
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