Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
I'll pick you up. Avoid slightly awkward no-we're-not-dating-but-I'm-still-screwing-your-son-after-2-years parental run-ins.
You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing
Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this
...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down...
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
Randomize
