me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
Randomize