We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
It's 1 AM and there's a guy outside my house belting out Bennie and The Jets. He stops in between verses to puke. I'm joining him.
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
Randomize
