shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize