So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
there was a trapeze. enough said
There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
