i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
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