Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Randomize
