just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
Are we still banned from the library?
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
