Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
Randomize
