ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
Randomize