I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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