her vagina looked like bernie madoff
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
Randomize
